Had a relaxing time at dinner last night with some friends.
It is sometimes helpful to be reminded that there are others who patiently accept ‘shit’ as part of their existence and embrace (an over-statement) them in different ways though not having the language to speak of them.
I am increasingly seeing myself surrounded by a world of human constructs. I can’t help but see denial as the ultimate expression of society. Differences are assimilated. That which cannot be assimilated is denied. Denial is the mask. When we have no courage to tear our masks away, we may soon find ourselves not able to differentiate the mask from our face… I need sleeping pills, please!
“On the surface an intelligible lie; underneath the unintelligible truth showing through” (Kundera)
The Unbearable Heaviness of Being 
I for one am always glad to hear that you are “relax” ‘cos you’re usually so busy and preoccuppied.
Talking about denial… 🙂 sometimes we don’t even know it until pointed out or is that an excuse …
lil’ jennie,
i would say we are more fearful than ignorant
There is so much ‘shit’ in our lives; some choose to patiently face it in a less confrontational way believing that time will take the stench away as we try to understand the source (reasons/reactions whatever!)of the ‘shit’and the by products that come with it!! Urgh…I am a ‘visual’ person so I already feel as if I want to puke!! I know you won’t have the faintest idea what just flashed past my faculties.
I guess to adopt this approach is normally after failures in the past to resolve the issues in frank and forthright communication; that the “face up” causes all or some parties to stir up more shit and makes life much more miserable. Another reason may be the ‘attempt’ to inculcate the fruit of the spirit in one’s life though I must say they have been crude attempts wanting of perfection. So am I a human construct? I hope not totally. In my pursuance to subject myself to the guidance of the spirit, I win some and lose some (oh so badly); in seeking significance in Him I find myself still caught in the significance of man; I hope I am an unfinished product trying helplessly to be what I should be and in the process finding myself sometimes in denial and sometimes in acceptance….did u just read a load of ‘shit’???
its me again…forgot to tell u that whenever I need to discuss my deepest thoughts I go to my sanity corner of friends. I wouldn’t call it ‘unmask’ cos I think I am genuine in relating to the people who do not know what I am dealing with inside me (perhaps except for one case at hand where I no longer know how to face the truth but is still in the process of trying to approach it with as much truth that I can afford); I think it is completely unnecessary to be an open book to everyone; that would be courting shit!
Actually, at this point of time when I am racing against time to complete my project paper, I shouldn’t be in this wordpress but my mind just need some destressing so I find myself in this faithful corner cos one of my so called faithful friends is too busy to be in conversation. Well…this is second best to active conversation….hehe…call this sanity!!!
hi hu-ah-mee,
it’s always nice to see you around. the thing about this kind of ‘active’ conversation is that you may get to read the reply only after about 12 hours?
maybe it is necessary afterall to recognize that denial is undeniable.
I am reminded of an interesting philosophical dilemma attempted by an author once. (Turn up the the visual senses??) The author was fascinated by the fact that the same organs used to express love and intimacy are also used to eliminate waste products – vulgariy and the sublime coexisting harmoniously. whatever language we use, i.e. fruit of the spirit or acceptance, we are trap in the paradox of our own making. or we find ourselves in a cycle of rational inquiry. either way, they don’t look hopeful do they?
They do look hopeful! I agree with the author although I am learning not to see it as a dilemma, primarily cos I think I have been experiencing it and have been pulling these tensions in my life, yet hoping to remain sane and hopeful along the way. That’s why I do not see it as a mask but that I play different roles in different people’s life and I share different things with different people in my life..carrying burdens yet sharing true happiness with the ones that I believe He provides along the way… sadness and anger in some corners of me yet truly happy and hopeful in others (vulgarity and sublime coexisting harmoniously). Do I make sense? or is this still shit to you?
They are shit that make sense? 😉